Extra ***** Episode 28: We Changed The Name Of This Podcast. Thanks Harvey Weinstein

Friday, October 13th

What makes a guy like Harvey Weinstein think he can get away with allegedly sexually assaulting a women in public and ejaculating on a potted plant?  Is he a sex addict or a sexual predator?  Greg and Mike try to find answers with the help of Leo Keating LICSW from New England Forensic Associates.  If you think you have a sexual disorder or know someone who needs help you can contact NFA here.


Transcript - Not for consumer use. Robot overlords only. Will not be accurate.

Welcome to the extra sauce podcast. Found so offensive. Would this jar of sauces. Red pill. Got to change just for one week that title of the podcast that cannot we cannot doctoring we can't talk about Harvey Weinstein. Guys are. Harvey Weinstein. And and refer to the podcasters extra songs. It's not a synopsis while hole out all I think of his potted plant and I and I and I and so. Well it extra. Jews doesn't and that's even more than. Extra meat and that's I don't know it's nothing the Israelis are creep. Extra extra bread. Yes and that's natural that's good that's neutral that's excellent good. We hired going to be joined on the podcast this week a decade a counselor somebody who deals. Waited sex addicts and it's. It is a is an expert in treating him. Sexual addiction and compel compulsive. Secular specifically this guy who works with men with compulsive sexual behavior now define that because I find myself uninstall I'm I'm always on mr. Graham looking at that's motion checks is that. I think we're talking more of the you know Jackie leading into applauded play OK yeah I mean if you've got to that point oil against aground and I wanna contacts on them out. Now and my current diet condition I'm actually eating the plant materials that's it that's the allocate the vegetables are well. Hopefully without the slide out and out now obviously she no I mean. Actually died well there's nothing we can say here that's not going to be discussed earlier right it's a we should probably treated in a serious all right serious manner but. It's been a very interesting week you know. Harvey Weinstein. Is the producer and it's the Weinstein Co. which used to be called Miramax and I's considered by many to be one of the most powerful or was considered by many to be one of the most powerful people in Hollywood. And on Friday the last Friday it is New York Times. Release that expose day which in which they alleged that and many women alleged that he had committed sexual assault on them and every one from. Rose McGowan to. When it helped throw who I Angelina Jolie Alltel a very similar story in and that is that. He would invite them to a meeting and that meeting would. Most likely be in a hotel or in his when his apartments and he would then ask for a massage tour. Asked them take a bath with him he'd come walking out in in a robe wearing nothing else and on. Mean it's really it's disturbing aids and I think he you know. You said to me. Let's try to talk to an expert and figure out why. How how somebody does that pot over and over and over again my. My question is how you get to that point and I understand power comes into play yes as you feel like you're so powerful but Heidi get to a point where you are. You know publicly master baiting while cornering a woman I and you reject related to plant or or you we want them to watch you shower. You know and and and what drives that yeah you know on and on I know there is no simple answer but I was curious to see how someone who so powerful and so successful. You know gases point. And the horror for these women of not being able to sing anything about it because there were read about it. Where their next job is going to be worried. That he's not gonna. You know he's gonna tell everybody else other studios not the Iron Man I mean it's it's just. It's really serving it's it's it's really and I don't believe. You know EU EU EU had Ben Affleck apologizing this week. IE. It was just I just saw that. Oliver Stone. Had. Basically. Said about Harvey Weinstein that he was Oliver Stone was gonna wait on offering up. Condemnation until he had been proven to be guilty. And there is a woman. Area playmate. Who has come forward now today and said that that he groped Oliver's own Grosvenor. At a party 26 years ago and I assume that's because Oliver Stone didn't condemn Harvey Weinstein I mean it seems like. It and it may be may be behavior that is more common. In Hollywood I've been and is that it is in a regular in a regular work. Place I I would think so 'cause of that that particular industry and how there are some Lakewood would these women who are coming out. Ellis awful what happened but there are different degrees ya you know like good and and LB Brian up on the show a lot some women are OK with the using sex. To advance their career you know so those women do it conceptually knowing it'll get them somewhere but when it you know forcing it upon. Someone or threatening someone's career. Us now Harris is yes it's freaking grows the but the movie you know you have a lot of attractive people in Hollywood. And you have as you said you have you know some men or women I suppose who were willing to sleep their way to the top. But then you have a guy like this who becomes. I believe a predator and they're the reason I'm excited about talking Leo. Is because. I don't understand how somebody in their mind. Gets to the point where that predatory behavior seems normal they write it seems as seems every date them I mean it you know. We played some audio. On the show today where Harvey Weinstein said he made a mistake. And it's Albania a second chance this this. Any minute sound like he had and said something said something inappropriate got office right so I made it sound like I'm in a mistake I just news it's like okay well three over three decades in Rebecca has not just like a mistake yes yeah. So we are joined right now on this podcast. By by Leo Keating. Who is a counselor waited the New England forensic associates and it's Leo thank you very much for giving us a little extra you know what on Harvey Weinstein. Are happening. So. Every Weinstein is. In your opinion a sex addict Expos in in you know until you treat somebody you don't know but. How do you decide how do you how they've decided somebody's sex addict or they're just really really creepy. I'm well certainly that happens that met interviewed or assess mr. white it's like can't really. Talk about him specifically but I can talk about. You know kind of folks in positions of power who engage in sexual misconduct yes you know I have been kind of in general. I do you think you're right I do think that there is a sense for some people once they get themselves into trouble. You know sort of seek treatment as a way to avoid that. And it's hard to know for each individual that you don't really is in fact the case. You know they really do need treatment or infected are just tried to avoid responsibility. When it comes to you know you talk about power and the you know way as opposed to use. Bill Clinton as an example or or ivy or Harvey Weinstein is. Is this Ian is this in all of us in our sexual nature that if we were to be powerful week week and act like this. No I certainly don't think so because there are so many people who are in positions like who don't engage in this type of misconduct. I do think there's a common theme amongst folks who do get themselves in the district of trouble were more ridiculous or misconduct. And I think it's just an overall lack of empathy. You know they really don't see their behaviors being detrimental to others. You know many people ask you know why would someone in this position. You know sort of forced consultants and what's actually when they could. You know just engaging in central sector quite easily. And I think that that the answer is. So hopeful but the first of which is that they really don't see their behavior as being. Detrimental to the other people involved they've justify their own by the situation that. You know they kind of see it as being being quite normal. Leo and in my fully unqualified opinion. I don't think he's a sex addict because I don't know what this ecstatic with someone with the means that Harvey Weinstein has been able to buy. Escorts of all grades and and and sizes and shapes and everything he really need media the money to do that. I certainly and I think that for kind of all individuals who engage in sexual misconduct. I'm their motivations vary quite oddly. You know for some people it's it's just sex and for other people it's. You know kind of power control. I think four or. Most people that would find section easily easy to attain either through. You know normal means or through a scorcher for other things. That their motivations for engaging in you know sexual misconduct might not. Be just work. The sexual gratification. I do think that when people see this behavior they assume that you only reason that individual to get is is for the gratification but. It factors up and many other motivating factors. You know such as such as controlling other people. You know the the Hollywood environment is very sexual revised its it's full of the beautiful people. I assumed that. You know like in other areas of business in and other areas of life there is a lot of flirtation that goes on. Is it difficult. For either a meal or a female. In power. To understand. That. A flirtatious. Actress her Horry flirtatious actor is just merely act order they start to believe in their mind that that person really wants to have sex of them. Yet no I think the reason people do get distorted people when in positions of power really can come to think that the behavior is justified. You know almost no matter what even they're you know assaulting people hurting them and you know doing bad things to them. You know for many of the books that I mean who are positions of high power fame fortune. Whatever it is going to be big they've really. Did they do not see their behavior has. That's hurting other person. They see that you know sort of an entitlement. Yeah I mean it's it's no interest thing. You know Gwyneth Paltrow I think is a good example of this where you would often see when a culture oh. We had him you know at an awards show or at a at a party and and she would. You know she would comment on and on hand men and how's how much how much of a genius he was when he came to film. Is that day you know and then of course she comes forward this week and said that he tried to do that her. Is that it means is that something where she has a victim. Like mentality. War is. Or was it not he was it was not that big deal in her mind at the time for other people are being victimized. I just you know you don't see her record ailing when she's with the him hard. Yes well I think it's important not to lose cited the fact that. Four for people that are in this type of a super powerful role. That third hole where Opel people have to play ball. You know that if you wanna be in Hollywood if you wanna get anything done if you wanna have payment fortune as opposed to the rest of the you know acting population. You know there is some pressure to do things that may be nodding your best interest or detriment you or quite Capel. And I think that many of these individuals. Will. Be forced to engage in in no actual conduct or. To sort of be a sequel is an app acquiesced to these folks. Even though deep down and try to really use. It really is painful and I wouldn't hold too much treatment things that you see try to be in the public domain I don't think that that's necessarily accurate representation of what the pole vault. Like really be feeling the. Well what about the case of of Harvey Weinstein Asia Argentino. Now she claims. He sexually assaulted her. Yet later on had a relationship. With him yes and got to know his family. And they even traveled together. And and did things like that so it may not be as. You know like Quinn is tough for just appearing somewhere with them but they carried on a relationship does that do you see that happen at all and with what you do. Well there are certainly people that. Are successful at victimizing others over one anchor to arm and through that. Kind of victim victimized a relationship. Convince folks to do all sorts of things that aren't in the best interest I mean you see the most frequently in at a domestic violence relationships where. You have these men that are terribly abusive to their lives. If they stay with them almost. You know in the in the face of of sanity you know anyone on the outside looking in this thing how on earth YouTube. It's really because they're quite terra. That they're not thinking clearly. And that they don't feel like if they have any other options so well I don't know what is case specifically I do see people that are are victims. And it conferences. To make terrible judgments. It seems now that in this case it was really one of the worse kept secrets in Hollywood did most people in Hollywood where well here. His reputation. All do what. Ends up being. The psychology. Of a spouse in this kind of situation now. So I think a lot of it at Expos business partners and many others involved a lot of its financially driven. These people make tremendous sums of money. You know the folks at the at the company for these people work true. Pay off the victims who I think information and I'm who actually you know set up these liaisons. Degree or another. Brought complicit in it I would say that most of the other other parties are at war. Four strictly financial reasons. And they and they managed to. Look past the misconduct to you know kind of one degree or another. Because those financial reasons in terms of spartans. I think if there's all sorts of motivations. And it's it's it's often difficult to see. Problems and responses that are significant. And that it may appear Eric everyone else I am. Now but it beats. To the kid yourself or look past them. I know the answer to this but I think it's important he says it. In Harvey Weinstein Casey originally. Started to use the fact that he came of age in a different era in Hollywood in in his sixties and and things were different. They'd eat that coming of age in that period of time it like a free love period of time doesn't make what happened acceptable career at. Belt court side and I mean there's always been the expression out of the casting ballots yes which. You know which is is kind of quietly. Except that but I mean it really should be properly approach. You know that's what you're saying is you've taken. I have on protecting women and forcing him to have sex to get roles in films and TV shows or whatever the case maybe it. But there are but there are probably I mean I think on the be the difficult line would be. That there are some women and some men who probably do is sleep that weight to the top and centrally. Right. Short and that that is certainly true when I picked it back just exacerbates the problem. Because then the the perpetrators of the effect of these for him to say well you know. Offers elegant as you know everyone must. While they want to know are the New York Britney The New Yorker piece that came out this week. Woman after woman after woman. Mentioned and I thought it was weird. That in the course of trying to you know to make this happen and trying to have sex of these men and as he began to try essentially detritus. Abused them he would bring up. The actors the well known actresses who he said had done with him. Is that his form of coercion or lower you know you know they did it so it's okay. To do it. Yeah well I think that these these folks and engage in this behavior when we use all types of manipulation. To justify what's going on. You know the minimize their misconduct. Don't compare other people. They'll use drugs and alcohol. You know it they'll take you on exotic trips all of those things are ways in which to justify. Several manipulation. And you can certainly understand how people young immature. Crap on sophisticated ninety people could succumb to all these. You know it's easy to kind of understand how some. Uneducated stepped silence from nowhere it is you know alternate them to someone who. It takes them on a private yacht and you know champagne and answered. I'm I have a question about his his pattern. His specific actions and I don't know what they meaner maybe you would have a better idea of how he got to this point where. He would usually have them come to him and then he would shall open robe. You know open. But it was mostly he would want them to watch him shower. Or our governor Sabbath or clean himself. Kenya is do you have any idea of how he got to that point like what may I know you don't know him you never talked double what may motivate a person to wanna do those particular actions. Yes so I don't have so I don't know for him in particular but I do know that some people were going to victimize others. They sort of want to desensitize them to whatever type of abuse their point yet all. So far easier for for someone to say hey can you give me aback grow rough might be two or. You know meet me for a drink than it is to say you know let's go upstairs and have sex. So I think for some people what they're doing is kind of feeling out the other purse. That is the way in which to sort of assess if they're willing to participate in this this type of thing either. You know semi willingly or. You know if a little bit more pressures applied rule will they sit com. Is it you know is somebody like. Him. Able to get better. Yes so I do I mean I brought a treatment program not quite eleven. So why do you think that most people who have engaged in sexual misconduct. Ten. And get better. But I think that it happened so have a complete change in the way that they expect. Force someone that I'm willing to understand. The Wayne which are actually affected other people. It really takes kind of a long course of therapy to get them kind of what we pulpit and empathy to help them develop an understanding. Other actions clearly have. Affected people. And am looking at their own sort of personality flaws that allow them to engage in conduct. And try to make those changes. I would imagine he'd have to remove himself from this and fire. Because I just oil and drug dealer right this environment is conducive to that behavior. You know and and it's like he said people helping him. He's got a enablers as to get better get out of that hole. Area. Well I think you bring up a good point that his behavior. This behavior in general doesn't occur in a vacuum. That if there are other people that either are facilitating it or feeling it. Or are you know completely complicit and it. That that they have culpability as well and I think for the individual with engaging in misconduct. If they're in a setting like that. It's only likely but it's going to continue. You know if you don't get it there are no consequence to anything you you've done. No one called you up on it and in fact. It gets facilitated. You know and I think it's unlikely that someone just of their own collections is likely to stop. But that being said I do think that there are individuals who eventually identify themselves. That having a problem because they army you'll step over some line that they felt like. No they really should not have cross. You know that the them. The musical has that kind of hitting rock bottom and does something like a war of. Well thank you for joining us to give us a little I was Guinness mean the name of the podcast is exercise but analysts say the Guinness exercise them realize they matter I I I and now. Let me ask you about treatment. Do you treat those who are addicted to sex of themselves asking for a friend asking for a friend. Yes so. All type of Austin's. Ranging from the most vital sort of you know chronic or watching it masturbation. To the most extreme you know had a field again violence sexual assault so if you're anywhere different as anywhere in that spectrum but it certainly didn't caught on model. All right thanks a lot for joining us. No property it. Interesting stuff just a weird weird very weird the whole thing is very weird. As of and very disturbing dia and extremely complicated yes isn't like he can't. Like one sexual predators definitely it's not like a blank he can't make a blanket statement aside from the fact that it's all pretty sick yeah but there's so many factors. That that going to you know. Why this is why this is why I watched dateline because there's nothing sexually erotic about dateline whatsoever it doesn't never even if they never even gets in the my dad wasn't Chris Hansen and dateline ballots that we had that was the that was it like a creepy yes I was the. Treatments. I don't get turned watching and well let me tell Osama dateline yeah. It's always the husband it could if could have played so you only his false faith it's always the husband. I thank you for listening to exercise. If you enjoyed this. Please subscribe on iTunes. Scripture or Google play. And will be back next week another episode of exercise.