Another April Fools' Day in the Books

April 2, 2018

If you're anything like me, you didn't believe a damn thing that anyone posted on social media this weekend because of April Fools' Day. Usually I'm pretty good at sniffing stuff out, but once in a while, someone pulls the proverbial wool over my eyes. It's made me hyper-aware of all the suspect things that people post, so I pretty much swore off every single announcement online. Oh you're pregnant? Prob not. (Also, stop w that one.) Oh Tom Brady retired? No he didn't.

 Burger King announced a "Chocolate Whopper," with chocolate cake buns, a chocolate patty, raspberry syrup ketchup, white chocolate onions, milk chocolate lettuce, vanilla frosting mayo, and candied blood orange tomatoes. Um... what? This sounds amazing. It'll probably leave you in a chocolate coma, but it sounds delicious nonetheless. LB mentioned this morning that he thought it was just a big marketing ploy, and I agree completely. Let's test a FAKE chocolate Whopper, and if enough people demand that we actually MAKE one, we will make a killing. 

introducing the Chocolate Whopper. coming soon. maybe.

A post shared by Burger King (@burgerking) on

Cup Noodles (uh, when did they rebrand and drop the "o" from the title?) teamed up with a company called Zenni Optical to make "steam proof" glasses for ramen eating.  The glasses have a tiny built-in fan that blows away steam, plus they have a detachable fork on the side. Yep. I'd be on board with this one too! BTW - Nissin Cup Noodles > Maruchan Instant Lunch, all day every day. Much better noodle texture. (We're talking instant soup here, folks. Let's not get into the cup vs. real ramen joint quality argument. No comparison.)

Netflix announced yesterday that it had acquired SETH ROGEN.  Not his work, but Seth HIMSELF.  They posted a video of Seth reading their new agreement, in which he "relinquished mind and body" to Netflix. He also gave them the right to frame him for murder and then film a docu-series about the murder.  After reading the terms, he said, quote, "If it worked for Adam Sandler it'll work for me, I guess."

And this... this cannot be real. God help you, Harvard. It's hard to believe this isn't an April Fools' prank, but you never know.  LINDSAY LOHAN claims she's been asked to be the commencement speaker at Harvard Law. It could just be promotion for the website, for which she recently became a spokesperson.